Monday, October 03, 2005

How We Met

Mollie said I should write about how Richard and I got together, and I concur, especially because I have to finish up some of my Personal History this month to get my Young Women in Excellence Award! Besides, last week was the 5th anniversary of our meeting--we found out we were expecting our 3rd baby on our 5th anniversary! So here we go...

Richard and I met on September 23, 2000 at my 29th birthday party. He was invited to my party in an effort by some good friends to broaden my dating pool at the time. He appeared on a local LDS singles website, so we invited him to the party (although I had my doubts since I already had 2 guys I had been dating at the party). So Rich came to this party with his roommate, “cold turkey,” so to speak, and we had nice conversation. He brought me chocolate covered macadamia nuts, which got my attention.

So, background: I was working as an editor in marketing communications and teaching Freshman Composition at a local college at night. I had just moved to Utah from AZ after a horrendous broken engagement over the holidays of 1999. I was still very much NOT serious about dating—I mean, I was dating, but mostly people I knew I would never marry—and staying really busy with work, church, and family stuff. Meanwhile, Rich had finished his BS at BYU-Hawaii and landed a great photography job at a big Salt Lake City studio. So we were both working, having fun, and BAM! We met each other just as we were getting settled into our post-grad lives.

I thought Rich was really nice, but I didn’t really think I would see him again. He had other plans, though. The next day (Sunday 9/24), I got an email from him, asking me out on a date the following Wednesday. I thought I could probably go out with him again, so responded with a yes. But then I thought I ought to sort of “check him out” first. On Monday I had to take friends who had flown in for the party to the airport, so I asked Rich if I could swing by his apartment, which was on the way home. I wanted to see what his lifestyle was like--if he was a big nerd or of he had some coolness; if he was a slob or neat freak, etc. Turns out he had a very nice, clean apartment, lots of interesting photos and stories, a cool, close family, a nice CD collection, and we had lots to talk about. So I felt okay about going out on Wednesday.

We went out on Wednesday and he was like 20 minutes early to pick me up. He was soooo excited! I remember he was wearing some cargo shorts and a dark red Eddie Bauer rugby shirt. We talked about where to go, and I thought it would be fun to have a Skee-Ball tournament at Chuck E. Cheese’s—plus, it was near my sister’s house and I could introduce Rich to my niece, Ally, who was about 10 months old then. Well, we had fun at Chuck E.’s—we had our picture taken there and I still have it, and we used our tickets to buy a pair of parachuting ninjas. Then we went over and played with Ally for a while. My sister and I agreed that, although Rich had certain nerdiness, he was also super-genuine and sweet. So I went out with him again on the weekend, and he came down to hang out with me on Sunday evening (we lived about 40 miles apart—I in Orem, he in Salt Lake City). My roommates (a designer and a social worker) started asking about him because he came around so often, I pretended to be chill, and we just kept dating. Once, after I had told him they were jealous that he always brought me flowers, he brought some for all three of us. How cool is that? We talked a lot, we did fun things, but also learned a lot about each other—every date had some kind of theme, like sharing family photos and stories, or mission photos and stories, or all-time- favorite movies on DVD, etc. It was a whirlwind of fun and Rich was wearing down my resistance.

So I was dying inside because I pretty much knew in my gut that this was “it,” but it wasn’t really how I had pictured it all and I was still a little shell-shocked from the previous year. But there was absolutely no danger or worry with Richard—never has been, never will be. I felt safe and certain from the very start because I knew he was shamelessly smitten. What else could I do? I mean, I had been telling God for years that if he wanted me to get married it would have to be obvious and safe, and the man would have to be the world’s absolute best Daddy. There never could have been a clearer answer than Richard. I could have denied it and fought it and gone my own way—but I will guarantee that I would be divorced or widowed by now. I am always grateful for what seems like divine intervention and for Richard’s persistence.

Long story short: we met September 23rd. Our first date was September 27th. He brought me to Montana to meet the family and see the homestead on October 27th and we became engaged on a mountainside in Paradise Valley on October 28th. Yep—a lengthy 35-day courtship, followed by a 3-1/2 month engagement. We were married February 17, 2001 in San Diego and had 4 receptions/ Open Houses over the next month as we traveled through CA, AZ, Sonora Mexico, Utah, Idaho, and Montana (we settled in Salt Lake City). Nine months and 4 days later, we welcomed Baby Adeline to our family, and as they say, lived happily ever after. We hope, anyway.

Here is the quote from the front of our wedding announcement that captures the essence of what happened between us:

“We recognize what is lovely because we have seen it somewhere else,
and…when we see and object or person that please us,
it is like recognizing an old friend;
it hits us in the solar plexus and we need no measuring or lecturing
to tell us that it is indeed quite perfect.
It is something we have long been looking for,
memories of how things should be.” –Hugh Nibley

Wedding Day 2001: MIL Rosalie, Husband Richard, Me, FIL Tom at the San Diego Temple where we were married.
A Kiss to Build a Dream On.

Wedding Day 2001: Cousin Candace, Niece Ally, SIL Angie, Me, Sister Sara, Niece Melanie, Sister Amy


cmhl said...

girl, you just about made me cry!!! that is SUCH a great story!!!! And such a great example, that you waited until you were 29,--- waited for the right guy!!!

I love that picture below of you & your sisters, neices/nephews, etc. everyone looks so happy.

and I love your "lenghty" courtship! hahahahah!!! Thank you for posting that!

Richard the Hubby said...

Yes indeed quite perfect!!!!

LAURA said...

see, you don't have to be dating for a long time to know that you were ment to be together! a month or two is perfect, now we are going on 9 years! woo hoo. I love your love story. so cute. I am so glad that you are finally happy. Sista, you rock!!!!!

Becky said...

I love that you wrote this all out. It gives me goose bumps to read it! Eternal families rock.

lisha said...

I am happy I got to read about that...linking to it was very smart! It makes me happy to know that my friend found someone so devoted to him. He is wonderful, you are a very lucky girl indeed.


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