My delightful old friend and blog pal, Stephanie Ingermanson Lund (yeah, I posted your WHOLE name) posted a hilarious tale of a date-gone-wrong on
her blog, so I decided to shamelessly copy her. And if you've got a good story, post it on you blog or in the comments here. Like I told Steph, might as well make use of those 15 years of dating, right?
So my first installment...OMG. Actually, now that I sit down to write the play-by-play, it's a bit sketchy. Erin or Heidi will have to correct me in the comment section. Somehow, somwhere, a few months after my mission (while living with
The Young Ones), I met a dude on the UTA commuting from work at a printing press. I can't remember the details, except that he seemed pretty lonely and I talked to him for a while and he asked me for my phone number.
Now, this was in the days before the luxury of caller ID, people, and also before I had any idea that I could/should give out a fake number in this situation (Really, this was always a huge problem for me---first, having a terribly soft spot in my heart for the Eyores and Underdogs of the world, and secondly, being a horribly inept/naieve liar). Also, he clearly had some socializing issues, what might be diagnosed as mild asbergers or something nowadays. So there ya go.
A few days later, Heidi gives me a message from him (I forget his name), and I look puzzled and then say, "Bus Boy!" Ack! And I am
acking in my head because I know I will go on a date with him, because that's what I do. I promised myself that unless I have a true prompting NOT to go (sense of danger), I should have the courtesy to say yes if someone has the courage to ask. Yeah, I know. That's a standard I prolly won't pass on to my girls, but I must add here that it's prolly what led me to my hubs cuz I kinda didn't really want to go out with him at first, either. Nothing against him, I just wasn't INTO the dating at the time. So I must say this policy resulted in the treasure of my life. Anyway, back to Bus Boy.
So he wants to take me to a movie and
The Remains of the Day is playing at the Wilkinson Center so we decide to see that (which, mmmmkay--if you have seen that movie, you know the pace and subtlety of the story line, and I am going with a borderline asbergers patient; bus boy+subtlety=match made in hell). Bus Boy clearly has no car (common in Provo) so we are walking across campus--from 500 N to the Wilk-- at night, so I insist that one of my roommates joins us, cuz, you know, they don't call it "rape hill" for nothing. Just in case.
So we go to the movie and have a totally awkward time. Bus Boy is totally lost with the story line. I am totally uncomfortable, but he wants to walk us home. Um, okay. We walk and make clumsy conversation. He asks me if , appropos of absolutely nothing, he can hold my hand. Um, okay. We walk past the old testing center (where we went to church) and head down the hill, when he asks me about another date.
In my head I am screaming, "REALLY? Nooooo!" but I tell him I really like someone else and it wouldn't be fair, but thanks for inviting me tonigh--and I am interrupted by an almost-yell, as he exclaims, "Dang it! Why doesn't anyone LIKE me? Why can't I have a girlfriend?" I stand there everso uncomfortably watching my date launch into a tirade/meltdown. I feel
really bad, but I know that sharing my sympathy is going to give this guy the wrong signals. I just know--I have learned from sad experience. So I mumble my condolences and maybe I grab
HEIDI's* arm and say, "You don't have to walk us the rest of the way. I can see that you're upset. I didn't mean to hurt your feelings." And we practically run home, glad he doesn't know exactly where we live because--just a hunch--Bus Boy may be a little unstable, and you never know when you could be someone's last straw.
* see Heidi's comment below...it was fun for her, too. And Heidi, we wanted to beat up that blasted Hoodwink! Rememebr when he stopped by to see you after The Breakup and you weren't home. He asked Erin and I when you'd be home and we both said, "NEVER!"