LAST MONDAY

Need a Little Lisa...

It's time to get comfy because I'm going to tell you story. At first I was just going to post a picture of the necklaces I just made, but I am in a writing/ personal history kind of mood, so you get a story today. Ready? Okay.

Once upon a time, I lived in Provo at Frankenhaus, alone in a big bedroom at the top of the stairs where it got very hot in the summer time. Actually, the time upon which this all went down was the very hot summer of 1991. My boyfriend, Kevin, was using Frankenhaus as his mailing address while he was out gallivanting around the U.S., visiting his sisters and working in Washington, D.C. He would come back for a week or so at a time and stay with me, then be off again. It was while he was away that one Miss Lisa Robbins knocked on my door looking for him, having recently returned from Korea (I know what you're thinking now--you're wondering why I am stuck in PROVO for the summer while everyone I know is off on bold international adventures and the answer is that I had to WORK while I was in school. Don't be jealous).

So Lisa knocks on the door of Frankenhaus asking for Kevin (and yes, I realize I just changed tenses, but it's okay--pretend like we're just chatting and forget the grammar, k?). I tell Lisa that Kevin is gone, but she can come in and we end up hanging out all day long. I discover we love the same music, especially the Sundays and agree that Harriet Wheeler was the best singer of all the singers we'd discussed that day. I don't remember what else was discussed, only that from that moment on, we have been friends. Like instant, just-add-water, bosom-buddies. She is 364 days older than me, meaning her birthday is the day after mine, the year before mine (and while I don't read my horoscope or anything, I can't help but think there is something to astrology because Libras are freaking AWESOME). We have shared many a party, and the very next year after we met, we were both missionaries--Lisa serving in the Dominican Republic, me serving in exotic North Carolina. You can bet the very best letters I got were from Lisa (because--oh, yeah--we were both English Major nerds, too!) Post-mish, we were back in Provo together for a year, and then life pulled us in all different directions. But we've stayed friends because we are both committed communicators and because Lisa makes me laugh like no other!

THEN: Lisa, Me, and Phoebe in Summer 1995
NOW: Lisa with husband Tom in Virginia
(notice she just get lovelier with age, which I envy)

Lisa lives and works in the DC area and was married to her long-time friend-n-love, Tom Anderson about the same time I gave birth to James (so I had to miss the wedding, which still makes me a little sad). She keeps a wonderfully witty blog (much more clever and understated than this one) and you should check it out HERE. A few years ago, Lisa took a glass-bead-making class and sent me some awesome handmade earrings, as well as a few other lose beads. I have been wanting to use the beads for a long time, but I just didn't know how. Another Awesome Libra Friend, Debbie, taught me to bead jewelry, so this week I finally made myself some Lisa originals! I can take a little Lisa with me everywhere now! BEHOLD:

Two sets--one of glass & stone beads, the other with lots of blue glass and silver (from my mom). Can you spot the Lisa beads?

There's the blue one on the necklace...

and the green one on a bracelet!

***

Lisa, have I told you lately that I love you? Because I do. When I reflect on the randomness of our meeting, and then the subsequent strength and longevity of our friendship, the phrase "blessed and lucky" always comes to mind. Also, I can't help but feel like the best fruits of my relationship with Kevin are my girl friends! Yay that. Anyway, thanks for being you and for all the thoughtful things you do. My home and my inbox are practically littered with loving Lisa things, and I really do cherish them because you're fabulous.

Grandma Gifts

I read this post today from cjane and it killed me.

Tonight I cleaned Addie's room so my sister, Erin, and her husband and baby can sleep in it tomorrow night. As I straightened up Addie's (piles and piles of) things, I noticed how sweet and girly all the little things in her room are.

And then I noticed that, with few exceptions, all of her dainty treasures have come from her grandmothers: Hand-made Barbie clothes and necklaces and daisy quillow from Grandma Rosalie, Satiny-fleece blanket from Grandma Becky, Pet Shop Pets and hairbows and stationery from Nana, Poetry Books and China Dolls and greeting cards from Great-Grandma Lyn, Teddy Bears and love notes from Great-Grandma Sine... Five wonderful women passing on a legacy of femininity, little mementos of What It Means To Be A Girl, to my firstborn daughter.

[Baby Addie and Me, December 2001]

I got a lump in my throat. I am so glad for all the help I have to raise her. I was so overwhelmed to have a daughter--when I first found out she was a girl, I freaked out a bit. But I think we are BOTH growing up to be good women, helping one another along the way, and feeling thankful for the other women in our family who are helping us from afar.

[Grandma Lyn, Great-Grandma Marie (Gramareeeee), Baby Me, and My Little Mommy, Blessing Day October 1971]
[Another Blessing Day, 30 years later...
Mom, Grandma Lyn holding Adeline, and Me
January 2002]

[First-Time Grandparents! Addie with Grandma & Grandpa Melin
on her Blessing Day]
[Grampa Jim and Gramma Becky admire Baby Addie, December 2001]

[Grandma Sine rocking Addie, December 2001]

Letter to me from my Grandma Lyn, circa 1975

***

PS: While I was nosin' around my 2002 Photo Archive, I found this adorable picture of Addie, Ally, & Isabelle on the day we moved to Montana from Utah. I couldn't resist doing a "then & now" comparison:
Of course, we added Heidi to the mix, and Ally is no longer the biggest, but they are all still so adorable and they love each other so much. Hooray for cousins!

KINDERGARTEN CAMP!

[But first, here's the ONE picture of camping on Friday...you can see some fo the rust-colored trees where the pine beetles have killed off half the forest]Heidi has Kindergarten Camp this week, kind of a fun-filled orientation for the new little kids...
Here we are on Monday morning meeting Principal Hunsicker.

Heidi is so excited to meet her teacher and class! James loves the playground!

Skip-to-my-lou!

This is Heidi's teacher, Mrs. Thums ("Tooms"). She's going to be great for Heidi! (She looks a little fierce in this picture, but she is a kindergarten veteran--so awesome, she reminds me of Mrs. Mercaldo at Roger's--I think she taught my whole family!)

Lining up

Heidi is ready for school! (8/26 is the first day)

End of a Season

It's only August, I know. It's not even mid-August but I keep feeling Fall. It has been cooler than usual and all the wild sunflowers are out. Nothing says "BACK-TO-SCHOOL" to me like those flowers, so even though we have another month of sunshine, I feel like summer is already over. *SIGH*...reminds me of Reluctance by Frost [although nobody loves autumntime more than this blogger, I promise!]:

"...Ah, when to the heart of man

Was it ever less than a treason

To go with the drift of things,

To yield with a grace to reason,

And bow and accept the end

Of a love or a season?"

Roles of a Poet

So Thursday night, Rich had to go to Bozeman to lead the Stake Preparedness Meeting and I had the kids at home. They were getting rowdy, so we went for a drive along the river and listened to NPR...I can't remember if it was a segment of All Things Considered or a City Arts & Lectures, but the author of a book about Robert Frost came on to lecture about poetic theory and Frost's influence and how he was different, etc...did anyone else hear this? Does anyone else know who the author is? I was really enjoying it but didn't get to finish it and I would love to read the book.

I especially liked his brief history of the poet's role, starting with the Greeks, and how the poet was The Recorder of What Must Not Be Forgotten. For the Greeks, it was more historic and epic, but Frost tweaked that definition to a much smaller level--moments, images, thoughts--things from a single life, a single day, which must not be forgotten. He talked about Seamus Heaney, etc...and then I had to go home. Help me find out who this dude was...Jay Parini? Tyler Hoffman? Jeffrey Meyers? None of those names rings a bell, but they are all Frost scholars. Maybe it was one of them.

***
UPDATE: It's Sunday now...Really?? Nothing? Where are my fellow nerds? Hey, maybe a computer geek who reads this blog could do a better search for me and find out....COME ON, PEOPLE! ;)

Unposted

I have this folder from July of photos I wanted to post but never did, so I am going to post them today since I forgot to take pictures of camping this weekend. Here's Isabelle Petersen (my niece, Belle) playing dolls wiht Addie.
Here's the whole parade gang on July 2nd.

SMOKEY!

Addie at the parade

Addie & Belle (LOVE this)

Ally with her awesome parade hat

The kids getting candy from the Shriner Clown

More parade gang

Heidi at the parade

James

James & Belle

Daddy & James

More cute parade pix...

Marshall watching the parade

Mules!

Pipers!

My Cutie Hubs arriving at our parade spot from his office.

[notice Heidi shouting "Daddy!" and running from across the street]

WOODSY!

Sweetie Cousins: Belle and Addie at the Parade.

Wrestling

I'm going camping in the rain tonight. I hate camping but I also hate my house today, so it'll be good to be out with my kids. Addie and I are going to embroider til our fingers bleed! I know, sounds heavenly! I broke down today, hardcore. Something inside my head physically snapped, I felt it. I woke up with a back- and head- ache so severe my chiro couldn't adjust me at my 11:00am appointment. Taking a morning jetted-tub-soak didn't help, and neither did two Excedrin migraine. The left side of my face was tingling, and pain was shooting down from my left hip through my knee to my ankle and arch. I threw up twice from the nausea. After recovering from the second time (2:30-ish?), I emerged from the bathroom to find that (a) Heidi and James had just trashed the family room with their coloring supplies, (b) James had wet his pants for the 3rd time today, and (c) proceeded to color himself all over with a sharpie [sound familiar, Jenn???]. That's when I snapped.

I was so angry, I couldn't even discipline them. I couldn't even talk. James gets hosed off with a cold hand shower when he has accidents and I had to try so hard not to throw him in the tub. I hosed him off, then made him soak for a bit to get the marker off his skin. Heidi figured out she'd better move it, so she cleaned up their mess and went and laid on my bed. By then I was crying and I couldn't stop. It totally freaked me out. I was just sobbing and I couldn't put a lid on it. I called Rich but I couldn't talk, so that freaked HIM out and he came home. It took me a good half hour to stop sobbing and shaking-- seriously freaking out. Every possible negative thought was just flooding my brain, and when I consciously tried to bring something positive to my mind, it just blew by or turned into a guilty feeling. It was like a dementor attack. I finally got a grip , but then Rich tried to take the kids "so I could rest," but that made me upset again because there was nowhere for him to take them and I knew they should be with me. I finally talked him into letting them come down and lay by me. We had a calmer afternoon--watched a kid show then got ready for the camp out--but I literally had to white-knuckle my way through it, breathing deeply, praying in my head, blinking back tears. I am losing my mind. I so tired of not feeling good. But I am also tired of wrestling with darkness. Today was an example of the chinks beginning to appear in my armor. I am going up the mountain to repair some cracks, find some peace, begin again. Again.

"For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world..." Ephesians 6:12

***

PS: THIS did cheer me a little. Maybe we'll watch Ferris in the tent tonight.